Comments on Comments

From Kayla and Haley
Story:
The conflict was between the jock being cool and helped the poor little nerd that fell.
The shots that contributed to the rising action are...
1. The long shot of the two girls walking down the path.
2. The shot of the jock saying, "Now that's what i'm talking about."
3. The shot when the nerd runs up with the umberella.
4. The shot when the nerd falls and starts to cry.
Here are some suggestions about adding to the rising action:
1. You could show that the nerd has a crush on the jock.
2. You could also instead of the nerd tripping by herself maybe have the "mean girls" trip her.
The climax occurred when the jock helps the nerd up.
During the resolution the jock starts to run with the nerd.
You could add to the resolution by having the jock and the nerd hug after he helps her up, and link arms while they're running. This would help give us the idea that The jock is actually very considerate and helping.
Camera shots:
We especially like the long shot of the "mean girls," because it helped emphasize the idea that they were going to be somewhat important in the video.
We think that you might add a shot right after every cut because it feels like we're going in a circle at times. The new shots would be consistent. This would help the flow.
Edits:
On a scale of 1-10, we rate the editing a 5. One edit we would change was between the nerd running up the first and the nerd running up the second time. We aren't sure how the in point/out point are supposed to be set because it makes no sense.
Use of music and sound effects:
There is no music.
Titles and credits:
The title of the film reflected its contents well. It did grab our attention. We don't have any suggestions for the a new title.
The titles were consistent and they were effective.
Overall;
Overall, we thought your film had a good idea/story line but the cuts need to be done better. What we liked best was the acting and the jock helping the nerd. Our strongest suggestion is that you fix all your cuts. (No offense)

The conflict is between the jock and himself.

From Cassie

Shots, dialogue, actions:
1 The shot of the PE students walking out on the field--adds realness to everything
2 The wide shot of the nerd. It showed her emotions more clearly.
3 The shot of the jock and the nerd running off together. It showed the ending clearly.


To add to the rising actions I could show the nerd having a crush on the jock MORE so. It seems like she does but we can't be sure, she might just be really friendly.

The climax occurred when the jock helps the nerd off the ground.

To add to the resolution I'm not too sure.

The shot of the means girls to the jocks was a straight cut. Just the acting added so much to it. It was somewhat comical BUT it worked.

There was no music to comment on.

6 on the editing. I think it could be cleaner and plus there was no music.

The titles and credits to me somewhat fit but they aren't a PERFECT fit to the film.

Overall the film was pretty good. Just need to find music that you can use for it.

Positive Comments
1. The jock is actually very considerate and helping-Hayley and Kayla
2. We especially like the long shot of the "mean girls," because it helped emphasize the idea that they were going to be somewhat important in the video-Hayley and Kayla
3. The title of the film reflected its contents well. It did grab our attention –Hayley and Kayla
4. What we liked best was the acting and the jock helping the nerd-Hayley and Kayla
5. Overall the film was pretty good-Cassie

Suggestions
1. You could add to the resolution by having the jock and the nerd hug after he helps her up, and link arms while they're running. This would help give us the idea that The jock is actually very considerate and helping. –Kayla and Hayley

2. Our strongest suggestion is that you fix all your cuts. (No offense) –Kayla and Hayley
3. There is no music -Cassie
4. Overall the film was pretty good. Just need to find music that you can use for it. -Cassie

By:Bree, Cody, and Michael

Positive Comments
1. The jock is actually very considerate and helping-Hayley and Kayla
2. We especially like the long shot of the "mean girls," because it helped emphasize the idea that they were going to be somewhat important in the video-Hayley and Kayla
3. The title of the film reflected its contents well. It did grab our attention –Hayley and Kayla
4. What we liked best was the acting and the jock helping the nerd-Hayley and Kayla
5. Overall the film was pretty good-Cassie
This post is from Bree, Cody and Michael.
The positive comments that were most meaningful to us were from Kayla and Hayley, they told us that we need to fix our editing and that was helpful because. In addition, they told us that our titles and credits were attention-capturing and that helped us see that we did something correctly despite all the things we need to fix.

The two best suggestions we got were from Cassie.

She suggested that we should add some music that suits what we are trying. We agree with this suggestion, and our plan to address it is to find copyright-friendly music online.

She also suggested that we fix our titles and credits because they don’t suit our video. We kind of agree with this suggestion, and our plan to address it is to experiment with different fonts and formats.

Rough Draft/ Reflection

*Due to a shortage of time, Dr. Achterman instructed us (Michael and Bree) to write our reflection together.

1) The value we're trying to show is lending a hand, and to stop bullying. Lisa is a girl in our video that is bullied, and even when Cody's friend make fun of her, Cody stands up for what is right.'

2)As Cody said, we work very well togehter. I agree, we value each other's opinions, and are always open to new ideas.

3)We need to complete basically everything. We need to edit and recut all of our clips because the edits are very choppy. We need to edit our music, especially the in and out points. We need to finish inserting titles and credits.

4) We want feedback on:
Do the various camera angles add to the message?
Are the cuts too choppy?
Where can we improve?
Is the music helping convey the message?

5)*Due to a shortage of time, Dr. Achterman instructed us (Michael and Bree) to write our reflection together.

1) The value we're trying to show is lending a hand, and to stop bullying. Lisa is a girl in our video that is bullied, and even when Cody's friend make fun of her, Cody stands up for what is right.'

2)As Cody said, we work very well togehter. I agree, we value each other's opinions, and are always open to new ideas.

3)We need to complete basically everything. We need to edit and recut all of our clips because the edits are very choppy. We need to edit our music, especially the in and out points. We need to finish inserting titles and credits.

4) We want feedback on:
Do the various camera angles add to the message?
Are the cuts too choppy?
Where can we improve?
Is the music helping convey the message?

5)*Due to a shortage of time, Dr. Achterman instructed us (Michael and Bree) to write our reflection together.

1) The value we're trying to show is lending a hand, and to stop bullying. Lisa is a girl in our video that is bullied, and even when Cody's friend make fun of her, Cody stands up for what is right.'

2)As Cody said, we work very well togehter. I agree, we value each other's opinions, and are always open to new ideas.

3)We need to complete basically everything. We need to edit and recut all of our clips because the edits are very choppy. We need to edit our music, especially the in and out points. We need to finish inserting titles and credits.

4) We want feedback on:
Do the various camera angles add to the message?
Are the cuts too choppy?
Where can we improve?
Is the music helping convey the message?

5)A problem we had was not having all our cast showing up when we needed to film. Another problem we had was that Lisa is not very good at filming. I think If we had more time to rehearse the filming might have been better, and a lot more productive. I think maybe next time we should really consider another script due to a lot of people and the outside setting.